The First Snow Fall...

Weather is a great metaphor for life -

sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad,

and there's nothing much you can do about it but...

carry an umbrella.

~Pepper Giardino

Today was something like the first sight of

snow fall...it was very peaceful. I know it's

probably just me but snowfall makes you

appreciate silence. Its so calm and its whispers

are so modest-like. Not fully understanding

of it's beauty. Everything seems to slow down

when it snows...

My Anthem...

Goapele-Closer

Closer to my dreams

Hanging over me,

I’m gettin’ higher

Closer to my dreams

I’m getting higher and higher
Feel it in my sleep

Some times it feels like I’ll never go pass here

Sometimes it feels like I’m stuck forever and ever

But I’m going higher
Closer to my dreams

I’m goin’ higher and higher

I can almost reach

Some times you just have to let it go (Let it go, letit go)

Leaving all my fears to burn down

Push them all away so I can move on
Closer to my dreams

Feel it all over my being (my being)

Close your eyes and see what you believe

I’m happy as long as we’re apart

Then I’m moving on to my dreams

I’ll be moving higher (moving higher)
Closer to my dreams

And higher and higher, higher

Feel it in my being (I can feel it all around me)

I know that I could not go alone (No, no)
I’m moving higher (higher),

oh...I’m going higher and higher and higher (Higher andhigher)

Closer to my dreams (Higher and higher, oh...oh...)

I’m moving upward and onward and beyond all I can see

(Stretching out my arms so I can breathe)
Feels so close it’s like strange

I can feel my dreams (Closer to my dreams)

I’m moving closer to my dreams

I’m moving (Higher and higher)

higher and higher(Higher and higher)

Moving higher, ho...Some times it feels like you never gon’ change (evergon’ change)

But you never choose to walk away

i love this song.

8:36 am: Headache & Heartache

In relation to others I fail to remain out of touch with the complexity of reality. Flaws always dominate the richness of humanity, well for me atleast. One morning I woke up with the uneasy coil of nerve fibers around enlarged blood vessels which created an unnecessary throbbing in my temporal lobes. I had a picture in my head that put a bad suggestion on the surface of my tongue and an upset feeling at the base of my stomach. I saw a world with personalities built on lies, beliefs based on ignorance, bullshit misunderstandings, judgement being passed by pretentious assholes, and every memory that made everything come crashing down...How may one find the reasons behind certain actions, so as not to create faulty assumptions? Lately, everything seems so mechanical to me. I really want to find a way to disown these negative thoughts.

Lost

Pensive What do I do to deserve your silence? I'm always on the short end of your temper. The world is screaming at me and I try to drown out the yells of anger with the scape of music. But the hollers are louder than the bass of my song. When will I be deserving of the happiness that life has to offer? Misfortune always seems to find a way to comfort me. Slow dancing with Misery is far from my intentions. "Chasing pavements" is simply my way of living. The draft of lonliness brings a chill to my bones. As hard as I try and no matter what, I can't seem to find the solace that I am lacking. Pillows will never snuggle back. This unfulfilling embrace is just so meaningless and rather pitiful. Empty to the touch.
Believe it or not...
I posted this on a good day.

However, I wrote on a sad day, sometime in October?!
at this current time and moment;
I'm not sad...I just had to put some
substance back to my blog cuz if you ask
me I haven't been writing anything worth reading.
I just dislike the fact that I write about sadness so
well...

Bad Babe Weekend...haha

I'm something like a bad babe

Pretty much a bad babe

She really is a bad babe

Yes I am a bad babe

Get to know this bad babe

Consider me your bad babe

Ok...

So, I was finally able to "let my hair down", I went to a party on friday(8pm-1am) and saturday(8pm-12am). Friday was at the Urban Education Center...I had a slow start but I got my ish together and I guess you can say I got my groove back [laughter]. Saturday, was in the Cabrini Mansion, the night for the grown and sexy. In the end, I had fun and thats all that matters.

The Boy Still In The Man...

I am . . .
son of da only street smart out da bunch-in
son of da one kicked out n da dark-in
son of da mother raised none outta six-in
son of da father raised 4, only 2 his-in
son of da girl who went to da store n neva came back
son of da boy cuz ofva bike got his brain gashed
son of da chick who try'd gimme a step-pop
son of da bull who turn her enemy my step mom

Father's seed wasn't seen
til 10 months after
she mothered the seed
God let death pass em'
he fathered da kid who thoughta suicide
he's da son ofva mother whom abused her life
he's da father ofva man feel'n still boyish
she's mother who birthed a life not az joyful
got a question for ya'll during your intercourse'n

Why ain't ya'll strap up n think about ya choices?



[written by Karon Frazier...my brother]

...its 11/11; make a wish.

I'd like to take my paint brush to the world, however, I know I couldn't even epitomize the beauty that already exists. I wish everyday would allow me the time to appreciate it and I apologize it has taken me this long to accept it. This life, so bittersweet but in all it's flaws you are still able to catch a glimpse of its delicacy. This is the Autumn I wanted to show you. Now, from all that restrained and repressed me...I'm free. The only thing i'm wishing for now is just an oppurtunity to surprise and exceed your expectations.